3 February 2018 · posted in self-care


Another one of my old blog's posts that seems to still be doing quite well on Pinterest, so I've brought it back for you! Hope you enjoy. 

We've all been there, applied for a job and didn't get it. We've all been there, put all our love into a relationship but dumped even when you weren't ready for it to be over. We've all dealt with being rejected over and over again and it's one of those feelings that lingers for days and weeks after and it stings, it hurts. Over the years I've worked out a few ways to cope with those emotions and maybe they might work for you too..


When dealing with negativity and rejection it's so easy to fall into the trap of identifying with that negativity or rejection. You feel like you are a failure, you feel like you are worth nothing. But that's not true. Yes, you got rejected by one company, one person, one situation, ... Maybe you really didn't have the right skills for that job. Maybe that relationship wasn't the right fit. Maybe there is a certain aspect of yourself that could use some improvement. So what? Nobody is perfect. Don't lose perspective and remember your strengths.

It's not you, it's them

Getting back one job application rejection after the other can make you feel as though you are just not good enough for any job. But what we fail to see is that many times the rejection is not about us being not good enough, it's about someone else being better. All you can do is work hard, do your best, and next time, you might just be the better one. When it comes to relationships, even though it's a bit harder to accept, rejection works in the exact same way. When relationships fail, most of the time, it's not about you being not good enough but about the other person looking for something they don't find in their relationship with you. Does this mean you are worthless? No. It just means it wasn't the right fit.


Turn it into a positive

A good way to deal with negativity and rejection is to make it go away. How? Turn it into something positive. The root cause of negativity and rejection often lies in certain aspects of your skills, your character, your appearance, ... not being good enough. Analyzing that root cause has two possible outcomes: either it tells you there's truth behind it or it's just mean talk and bullying. When there's truth behind it, make it a goal to improve on that part of you. Maybe you could indeed use some healthy food and gym workouts to lose that weight you've been packing on. Maybe you were really not putting in enough effort at work to meet deadlines in time. We're all human. It's okay to admit that you can do better. But when there's no truth behind the negativity:

Be strong & ignore

Sometimes people are just mean. Bullying and spreading negativity is some people's form of having power over others. In these digital times when you can easily hide behind your computer screen, spreading negativity has become especially easy and sadly there are those who love that kind of power. But from where I sit: blowing out another's candle will not make yours shine brighter. So have faith in yourself, know what you're worth and ignore the negativity. It's up to you to reject to be put down by others.